December 9, 2023

TNN Newspaper

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Church Rat vs Yahoo Boy: Who Will You Marry?

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Dicey was the exact description a minister of the Assemblies of God Church gave when TNN graced his auditorium in Port Harcourt, in a bid to know what his charge will be to his female members, seeking his counsel on who to marry between a church rat and a yahoo boy. 

Intriguing responses were gathered from this vox-pop. While some respondents consented to marrying a yahoo boy and leading him to Christ, some preferred a church rat believing that there is hope for him, while there are some who didn’t want any at all. 

Before you make your own decision and conclusion, let’s find out who a church rat is, and of course, who is a yahoo boy?

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  Mr. Ihekoronye Temple Chiamaka, a poultry farmer, based in Port Harcourt

Why do you think some ladies would prefer a yahoo boy to a church rat?
(laughs) It’s quite funny but it’s true. The thing is this, if you know that you have a devil in your house, you will be very, very prepared to fight the devil. But you have an angel of darkness, you don’t know what to do. Seriously, most ladies will want to marry a yahoo guy because they know that this guy is a yahoo guy, they know very well, so they are prepared, that worse comes to worse, they will pray about it, they will struggle, they will hit it, they will be very strong in prayers. But when you marry a church rat, my dear, you have 80 per cent of going to hell because one, your husband’s mentality, the man’s mentality is poor, his finance is poor and it may even lead the lady to go and do what she does not want to do. Many will involve in sexual acts, involve in stealing just to keep the family running, and also the man, if he occupies a treasurer position might be stealing the church money and giving to you his wife. So you see that some ladies will prefer to marry a yahoo guy than a church rat.

Are you a yahoo guy?
(laughs) I am not a yahoo guy and I don’t even want to be one and also God forbid, I am not a church rat. I prefer to be a yahoo guy than to be a church rat, seriously, I can’t be any of the two.

In ten words, what is your definition of a yahoo guy and who is a church rat?
A yahoo boy is someone that defrauds people, a church rat is someone that don’t have vision, he is mentally poor, financially poor, everything about him is poverty.

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Miss. Marylyn Maxwell, a Student and a young single

Church rat, yahoo boy, who will you marry?
None of the above.


What if those are your only two options?
Because the yahoo boy has no future,

Who said yahoo boys don’t have future?
No, no, no, he does have future because some like six months and they are gone

That leaves us with the option, church rat.
Ah! No ma, no, no, no, no. mentally poor, financially poor, ah! No, no, no I can’t further, no, no, no. I prefer being single.


Miss Goodness Irowhueli, an independent single lady

Between a church rat and yahoo boy, who will you marry?
Wow! This question is quite technical any way, but I will actually go for a church rat.

Because there is actually a hope that things will actually get better and for the fact that he is a believer, the issue is that he is not actually buoyant at that time, there is actually a future, we are supposed to be hopeful that yes it will get better someday but going for a yahoo boy, I can’t see myself even going out or thinking of getting married to a yahoo boy because the act of yahoo is actually stealing, and it’s a sin, it’s stealing, and most people are now going so diabolical about it. Because nowadays they do anything to get money, like if you go online you will see things happening, even recently, a ten years old boy was caught if not he would have killed his mum just for ritual, so, it is better I go with a church rat knowing that yes, the future is bright than a yahoo boy.

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I think I will rather prefer a church rat because a church rat you can easily change him, influence him, but for a yahoo person, who doesn’t know God, coming back to the fold will be difficult, but for someone who has been in the fold and is still in the fold, you will always have that confidence that you can always instil knowledge into him that will help him grow and then acquire wealth, so that is why I will rather prefer a church rat to that of a yahoo boy. They call it church rat but I don’t call it church rat, I call it committed brothers in the church, yes.

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Bible says seek first the kingdom and all other things shall be added into you. A church rat as you call it will at the long run get God’s blessings, but a yahoo boy has no God in him and may have committed some kind of crimes to get to where he is which God does not support. And at the long run may end up losing his wealth. A church rat also has the opportunity to grow through sound doctrines he gets. It’s not just about the money here. A church rat loves God, and will not want to fail God and as such has the tendency to keep to the commands of God concerning marriage. Whereas a yahoo boy will not and may someday involve his family in his illicit acts or put them into trouble and there will be no peace in the marriage because the God factor is not there.

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Between a church rat and yahoo boy, who will you marry?

I will marry a church rat. A church rat doesn’t steal, you know a yahoo boy is a thief because he steals from others, defrauds people but a church rat; he is just poor, a day will come and God will remember him, his faithfulness alone will attract God’s blessings. You can be a faithful church rat, a Christian church rat, a born again church rat, you don’t steal from people, you are okay the way you are, but for the fact that God sees your heart and sees that of a truth you are indeed a church rat, you are sincere, your heart is clear, your hand is not stained with blood, those evil things those yahoo boys do, God on his own will lift you up someday, based on this, I think if you ask me again, I prefer a church rat than a yahoo boy.


Reverend Prince Richard Anyanwu, Assemblies of God Church

I am sure you have single sisters in your church.
Yes, I do.

Okay, between a church rat and a yahoo boy. Church rat I mean, mentally wretched, financially wretched, visionless, missionless, please tell us, who will you advise the sisters to marry?

This question is a million-dollar question. First, it depends on the sister’s choice, you can’t take that right from them. It’s a big question, they are very, very dicey; a yahoo boy, a church rat.

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First, we should know that God’s measure of grace on everyone differs, also, everyone has his way to Damascus experience, that if you don’t harken, you miss eternity with God. God calls us out from our imperfection, we are all product of a price. I am saying this not to condemn but use this medium to make yahoo boys understand that they need help and can be helped if they generally turn away, forsake, confess and accept, but, a church boy who is a church boy indeed, diligent, faithful, is a light compared to the yahoo boy, what he needs is mercy, wisdom and direction, no one was created without a vision, mission and calling, now, I repeat, the choice is for the sister to make, But I pray, I pray, you know na.

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