If You Can’t Beat Them, Don’t Join Them.

“If you can’t beat them, join them,” so said Jim Henson. However, do you really think it’s the right way to go? In the words of a writer, “If you can’t beat them, create your own path.” Let’s reflect on exploring alternatives to joining those you can’t beat.

Do you know that the quality of your life is related to the quality of people you emulate or follow? Do you often compare yourself to others and use them as a measure of your progress? Do you have the drive to please others at the detriment of your dream? Do you subscribe to the perspective, “If you can’t beat them, join them?” According to K. Indiran, “‘If you can’t beat them, just join them,’ is not a right way of living. You have your own way of living. You need not fight anyone but you need not accept other’s values also. It could be worse, if the other person is doing something unlawful or unethical would you join that person? That could create problems for you or put you behind bars. So if you can’t oppose what is not correct, at least it is better to avoid.” Though the phrase may sound attractive and seem to conform to popular opinion,  a writer said, “Instead of conforming or giving in to the status quo, one should explore alternative ways to achieve success or reach their goals.” Life is not about competing. Thus, there is the need, as a writer noted, to emphasize “The importance of individuality, creativity and forging your own unique path rather than simply following others.”

So, rather than aspiring to conform to what you cannot overcome, enhance your capacity to transform, reform or persevere. As John Welch said, “Make your own mind up about what is right and what is wrong and about what is appropriate for you. Don’t run with the herd just for the sake of ‘fitting in’. Sometimes it’s the thing to do, sometimes it isn’t. Sometimes the majority are in the right. Sometimes one person is right and all the rest are wrong. Being in the majority makes it easier to get your way – it doesn’t make it right.” Know, as Aditya Dixit said, that one challenge of “joining them” is that “If you join them, YOU will cease to exist. The world will have a stronger them and no YOU. PS: ‘If you don’t stand for something, you’ll fall for everything.'” Listen to Jeremy Kao: “Keep in mind that once you join them, your chances of beating them will become increasingly difficult, and they’ll definitely be more difficult, assuming that they don’t drop off.”

As you step out, be committed to your individuality. Reject the mad race to conform. Let your drive be to make a difference rather than to avoid the difference.

__

Dr. (Engr.) Esang Esitikot is a COREN-registed chemical engineer, an HSE professional, a public affairs analyst, marriage counsellor, youth mentor and volunteer lecturer at the Institute of Health, Safety, Security and Environment, University of Uyo. He works for an international oil company and can be contacted via 08035103559 (Whatsapp only).