“The measure of a man is what he does with power,” so alluded Plato. F. Scott Fitzgerald once suggested, “I suppose the things that you desire the most are the things that you are the most weak about.”
These statements challenge the common perception of authority that is built on coercion or intimidation as actual strength, recognizing the critical difference between outer dominance and inner conviction. Let’s reflect on the profound distinction between authentic, generative power and the insecure, fragile weakness that masquerades as dominance.
Do you know that the impulse to exert dominance over others, particularly through actions intended to diminish or weaken them is almost always a psychological defence mechanism rooted in deep-seated personal insecurity? Individuals who rely on controlling others to assert authority demonstrate a fundamental lack of self-validation; they require the perceived smallness of others to inflate their own fragile egos. Though this “power-over” mentality may yield momentary, fear-driven compliance, it is profoundly inefficient because it destroys psychological safety, stifles creativity, and fosters deep-seated resentment. Ultimately, it proves detrimental to any collective goal or sustainable relationship. True power is relational and derives its strength from the ability to lift others up, foster genuine collaboration, and inspire loyalty through demonstrated integrity, competence, and humility. Conversely, the need to constantly make others feel inferior constantly demands external validation and so collapses the moment subordinates withdraw their fear or attention, exposing the underlying frailty of the supposed “powerful.” If you must actively weaken another person or group to maintain your feeling of strength, you confirm that your perceived authority is nothing more than elaborate weakness sustained by manipulation.
So, enhance your capacity to build influence through genuine contribution and radical empathy. Ensure that your authority, in any context, is rooted in character rather than ego or coercion. Recognize that vulnerability is not a liability but the foundational strength of effective leadership, requiring the courage to admit fault, listen actively without defensiveness, and share credit generously, thereby inspiring reciprocal trust and dedication. Consciously dismantle the need to be the smartest or most dominant person in a place. Instead, focus on empowering those around you by delegating meaningfully, providing constructive validation, and investing in their growth, transforming others into capable, self-sufficient allies. True power is ultimately exponential – it grows and multiplies as it is shared, creating a powerful network of contributors who are loyal because they feel inherently valued and respected, not because they are afraid of reprisal. Commit to this ethical standard to move beyond the superficial, draining display of dominance and cultivate a robust, resilient authority that is inherently self-sustaining and ethical, leaving everyone involved feeling stronger and more capable of collective achievement.
As you step out each day, resolve to embody a form of power that elevates and unites, not the one that seeks to diminish or divide others. Recognize that the most enduring leaders are those whose presence makes others feel capable and respected, proving that genuine strength is an act of creation, not destruction. Let your interactions be a testament to the truth that the highest form of power is found in the courage to serve, empower, and build up the strength in others.
- Esitikot is a professor of occupational health and safety, a COREN-registed chemical engineer, public affairs analyst, UN Ambassador for Peace, certified management consultant, World Safety Organization Ambassador, recognized Environmental Ambassador, marriage counsellor, youth mentor, reviewer for international research journals and volunteer lecturer at the Institute of Health, Safety, Security and Environment, University of Uyo. He is a manager in the oil and gas industry and was recognized by Highstone Global University, USA as the occupational health and safety personality of 2024. He can be contacted via 08035103559 (Whatsapp only) or email (esitikot@gmail.com).
